When I courted my own wife…

I dated my wife for about 12 months before getting a yes from her. I absolutely adored her free-spirit, her kind nature, her humor and of course her looks. She had everything that I wanted in a partner and I knew if I could get married to her then that’s the best that could happen to me.

It was easy to befriend her but was never easy to get her undivided attention towards me. I remember the incident where invited her for coffee, and I dressed my best to impress her but she was dressed in her hoodie and jeans. No effort at all. She would respond late to my texts, not go out of her way to meet me and all this made it clear to me that I was not special to her.

I tried very hard to court her. By being available to her all the time, whenever she needed someone, I was able to gain her trust. I almost got friend-zoned when she told me after 12 months of befriending her that she had a soft-corner for someone else. It was only when I almost walked out of her life is when she realized my importance and started liking me.

However, I am writing this post to stress on how we do not show the same kind of affection and appreciation towards our spouse once we have courted them. We take their existence for granted thereafter. We know we have already done the hardwork of impressing them so we shift our focus to something/someone else.

This is absolutely wrong in many ways. One should treat the spouse the same way they did before getting together. I understand that a relationship could reach a saturation point after which things may get boring. This is exactly when we tend to show more interest towards other men/women because there is so much excitement in getting to know the person, and if I may say chasing them. We could always use this energy in rekindling the relationship with our spouse.

I do the following every single day to ensure my wife still feels special:

  1. Kiss her every morning as soon as I wake up
  2. Cuddle for a couple of minutes before getting off the bed to give her warmth
  3. Have breakfast at home together
  4. Hug her before I leave from work
  5. Call her while at work to check on her
  6. Spend time with her after work to discuss how our days were
  7. Hug and kiss her before sleeping

Trust me, all these acts can be very important to keep your relationship stronger. When you know that your spouse loves you and is concerned about you, you would never look elsewhere for happiness.

Let me know what you all do to keep your relationship special. We could always help each other by sharing our ideas.



6 thoughts on “When I courted my own wife…

  1. I commend you for doing that. I am in a long distance relationship with my husband and physical touch is impossible but him calling me when he wakes up, send messages before going to work and while at work, and calling me again before he sleeps really makes me feel secure of his love.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi Jimi,

      Thank you for sharing your experience. It is true that actions speak louder than words. It is very important to show certain gestures towards your partner that can make them feel lucky to have you. It is one of the ways to make a relationship get stronger.


  2. This is great. A lot of relationships end because people forget to do the little things they did in the begin. Your doing a good job keep up the good work.


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